A fantastic book that every person should read is The DNA of Relaitonships by Dr. Gary Smalley. This book will transform the relationships that you are involved with, especially the most important one, your marriage.
Here our Smalley’s thoughts on communication.
1. Listen beyond the words to the feelings. People generally feel more understood, cared for, and connected when the communication focuses on their emotions and feelings not merely on their words or thoughts.
2. The real message is often the emotion behind the words. When you listen with your heart and listen for the heart of the other person, you show that you care.
3. Allow others’ emotions to touch you. People feel loved when they know you truly understand their feelings.
4. Effective communication is a dynamic process of discovery that maintains energy in the relationship. When you see communication as a dynamic process of discovery and not one of solving problems, you often solve the problems by default.
5. Effective communication starts with safety. When you listen rather than judge or correct, you create a safe environment for understanding to blossom.
6. Communication is understanding, not determining who’s right. Your relationships will thrive if your priority is understanding the other person.